Another week, more illustrations of myself. Is that narcissistic? Somehow it feels better to me than taking selfies, lol. Once again, you can see me run the gambit of emotions throughout the week, and it shows up in the art. I mean, how could it not?
A portrait a day is pretty difficult when you consider I’m a writer first and whatever this is second (I hesitate to say artist). I’m very curious to see where this leads. I’ve been toying with the idea of drawing a panel of a comic a day featuring what I’m thinking about. I don’t know, we’ll see.
If you like these and want to see more, checkout week 1 and week 2. If you want to support my work, feel free to buy one of my books by clicking on any of their covers to the right.
Right now I’m working on so many projects, sometimes it’s hard for me to keep them straight. I imagine it might also be difficult for you to follow along. So to try to, eh, clarify, I created this flowchart.
The bar on the left measures a project’s level of completeness. The bar on the bottom signifies time. So the projects in the top right are nearly complete but way in the future. To be honest, I’m not sure how much it does clarify. Maybe I’ll take another crack at it sometime in the near future.
Blood Meridian. I don’t know where to begin with this book.
It’s a western, or an anti-western. I’ve heard it called the greatest work of southern gothic lit out there, if that helps at all. It follows the kid (he has no name, always referred to simply as “the kid”) through 1850’s northern Mexico who joins the Glanton gang as they go on a scalping spree.
It’s fantastic. Maybe the best novel I’ve ever read. Definitely provocative, controversial, often difficult to read, eye-opening, mind changing, terrifying. The prose is sparse, gripping, often perfect, I mean really truly perfect as if some greater power wrote through Cormac McCarthy. What a novel. What a novel.
So many people have written about Blood Meridian, throwing my hat in the ring hardly feels justified. Doesn’t matter, I’m giving it a shot. My goal isn’t to be illuminating. I don’t think I can help you fully comprehend this novel. I just want you to read the damn book and wear the same look of shock on your face that I did during the three months it took me to soldier through it.
No it’s not a long novel. But it demands your full attention and concentration. Sometimes reading it was so taxing, I had to put it down for several days before I had the energy to pick it back up again.
And you should read it. No matter what I say throughout this piece, remind yourself that you owe it to you to read this book. It’s a masterpiece.
What’s it about? Professional American scalpers in 1850’s Mexico. The Glanton gang who butchered Indians for a buck, then Mexican villagers and American soldiers. They get consumed in the violence before getting consumed by the violence. Saying Blood Meridian is violent is kind of like saying water is wet. It’s a stupid sentiment because it’s so clearly evident from page 1 til the end.
Eye gouging in chapter one is the least of the atrocities. Scalping becomes commonplace. There are several massacres. The violence is never exciting. It’s never thrilling or fun. It is a gut punch until you grow numb to gut punches. By the end of this novel, you’ll form a callous around your heart. You’ll walk through life in a kind of stupor, replaying scenes in your mind over and over again. Will you gain a greater understanding? Probably not. But it will consume you, that much is certain.
There is a kind of illumination in the violence. Illumination of what, I don’t know. Was the novel written in defiance of God? I don’t know. Was it written with hands blessed by God? It could go either way. More than once I found myself seriously considering whether Cormac McCarthy is extremely blessed or cursed, sanctified or damned. I still don’t know. But God is in this book, and so is the devil.
The devil, in fact, makes perhaps the most literal appearance in the form of The Judge. But I’ve read convincing arguments that The Judge is in fact God. Who ever he is, he’s chilling.
The prose often require some effort to gain a full understanding of any given paragraph. Here’s a quote showing how difficult some paragraphs are to read, but you can’t deny the imagery these words conjure. This is perhaps Blood Meridian at it’s most difficult, but I personally didn’t mind:
A legion of horribles, hundreds in number, half naked or clad in costumes attic or biblical or wardrobed out of a fevered dream with the skins of animals and silk finery and pieces of uniform still tracked with the blood of prior owners, coats of slain dragoons, frogged and braided cavalry jackets, one in a stovepipe hat and one with an umbrella and one in white stockings and a bloodstained wedding veil and some in headgear or cranefeathers or rawhide helmets that bore the horns of bull or buffalo and one in a pigeontailed coat worn backwards and otherwise naked and one in the armor of a Spanish conquistador, the breastplate and pauldrons deeply dented with old blows of mace or sabre done in another country by men whose very bones were dust and many with their braids spliced up with the hair of other beasts until they trailed upon the ground and their horses’ ears and tails worked with bits of brightly colored cloth and one whose horse’s whole head was painted crimson red and all the horsemen’s faces gaudy and grotesque with daubings like a company of mounted clowns, death hilarious, all howling in a barbarous tongue and riding down upon them like a horde from a hell more horrible yet than the brimstone land of Christian reckoning, screeching and yammering and clothed in smoke like those vaporous beings in regions beyond right knowing where the eye wanders and the lip jerks and drools.
Holy shit! Did you read what I just read? Damn it, I might need to give up the craft. That’s the kind of thing you’ll be reading throughout Blood Meridian. For some, this is enticing, but it may dissuade many. Do not let it. This book is worth it. Trust me.
The truth about the world, he said, is that anything is possible. Had you not seen it all from birth and thereby bled it of its strangeness it would appear to you for what it is, a hat trick in a medicine show, a fevered dream, a trance bepopulate with chimeras having neither analogue nor precedent, an itinerant carnival, a migratory tentshow whose ultimate destination after many a pitch in many a mudded field is unspeakable and calamitous beyond reckoning.
The universe is no narrow thing and the order within it is not constrained by any latitude in its conception to repeat what exists in one part in any other part. Even in this world more things exist without our knowledge than with it and the order in creation which you see is that which you have put there, like a string in a maze, so that you shall not lose your way. For existence has its own order and that no man’s mind can compass, that mind itself being but a fact among others.
I mean, come on! It’s beautiful, dark, enlightening and nearly indecipherable on first reading.
There are scenes that will linger in your mind long after you put the page down. Such as when the Judge lifts a meteor over his head in defiance of the universe. Such as when the Glanton Gang make gun powder of piss and bat guano and lava rock, then gun down their pursuers with their crude recipe.
There were sentences so perfectly wrote I threw the book down and cursed because I’m fairly certain I’ll never be able to write half this well. It’s infuriating to see someone using language near perfection, even when it’s contained in a few short lines describing the way spit evaporates in the desert and how the lizards will drink it up before it bubbles and dries.
And that last paragraph. If you’ve reached this point, and you’re convinced that you’ll never read Blood Meridian, you owe it to yourself to read that final paragraph and see if it doesn’t give you chills. Even removed from all context, the final words of this novel will make your blood curdle.
I loved Blood Meridianbecause it more than once made me pause and think “How was that written by a person, a human being like me?” Can a man really be that good a writer? I don’t know. Can I ever be that good a writer? I don’t know. Probably not, and even typing that makes me sad.
It does, however, give me something to strive for. I’ll revisit this novel, of that I’m certain. And when I do, I think I’ll type out the best of pages word for word just so I can see how it feels to mimic what I can only describe as perfection. I have so much to learn from Blood Meridian.
My life has changed since I read Show Your Work by Austin Kleon: blog and twitter worth following. I think this is the best praise I can give a book. Not in an insubstantial way, but in the day-to-day. I spend my time differently.
Somehow this book got me excited to share my work. I’ve hated marketing for a long, long time. Funny considering I was an internet marketer for two years. Worst job ever. However, Show You Work altered my perspective. It taught me how to share my work, and for once I’m actually enjoying it.
Show Your Work is a quick read brimming with quality ideas that are simple to execute. Austin Kleon argues that one of the best ways of “getting discovered” and building an audience is to share behind the scenes information in a way that is interesting or helpful for others. On page 2, he says:
I think there’s an easy way of putting your work out there and making it discoverable while you’re focused on getting really good at what you do.
Sections like “Be An Amateur”, which focuses on embracing and celebrating your amateur status, are inspiring. Or “Become a Documentarian of What You Do”, which encourages you to open your creative process up to the world.
There are sections touching on the practical side too, like the facts that you should be sharing something daily. And common sense advice like build a mailing lists (if you’re an artist who isn’t do this, now is the time to start). None of the technical aspects presented anything new, but they pieces of time-honored advice and definitely worth mentioning.
He never dives deep into the technical. Rather, he tells you what you need to do, presents his case for each point, and leaves the rest up to you. In this way, Show Your Work is an overview. It focuses on your mindset, your platform, and daily actions you should focus on, but leaves the specifics on execution, platforms, social media, etc. up to you.
I liked this. It’s not a bible, but it doesn’t need to be. Even I, a slow reader, finished Share Your Work and got inspired to boot. Time will tell if the changes I’ve made will have any lasting effects on my platform. But I’ve started to document my creative process much more than ever before. I’ve started scheduling social media posts with trickles of information and tidbits about what I’m doing. I’ve become more deliberate about what I’m writing about on this blog. And lastly, this book inspired me to start drawing again. For good or bad, who knows, but drawing has become a daily part of my life now and I don’t plan on giving it up.
If you’re a creative looking for an audience, or needing a kick in the pants when it comes to sharing your process with the world, then I highly recommend this little book.
The Final Empire is an excellent fantasy novel which far exceeded my expectations. I’m new to Brandon Sanderson with one exception.
I’d tried to read The Way Of Kings last year, and I put it down after 5 chapters because I found one of the characters very trite and annoying. But after reading The Final Empire, I may need to go back and give it another shot.
Our belief is often strongest when it should be weakest. That is the nature of hope. –The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson
My wife recommended The Final Empire, and I realized this was the same author a few chapters in. The opening didn’t grab me here either, but she insisted that it would be worth slogging through. Lucky for me I gave it a chance because what I read was would become one of my favorite fantasy series ever.
Action as a hook doesn’t work for me because there’s no emotional resonance. Until I care about the characters, I really don’t care about the action. But once you pass this brief requisite “hook”, the characters start to connect and the setting begins to get interesting. Next we’re front-loaded with world building, still without a character to really hold on to. More trudging on.
But after you climb these early, awkward steps it starts to get interesting. And then it gets fascinating, captivating, magical.
The plot itself isn’t what’s engrossing here. It’s a standard hero overthrows the evil villain story. What’s interesting is how Brandon Sanderson is able to craft a standard villain into a believable human being with doubts and insecurities. It’s equivalent to making Sauron from Lord of the Rings a character you can relate to.
He does this in numerous ways, but primarily through the use of journal entries. As we read the diary of a man who’s about to rise to supreme power, we see that he was not always the evil emperor who enslaves us today. There was a time where he was just a person like you or me.
I consider myself to be a man of principle. But, what man does not? Even the cutthroat, I have noticed, considers his actions “moral” after a fashion.
Perhaps another person, reading of my life, would name me a religious tyrant. He could call me arrogant. What is to make that man’s opinion any less valid than my own?
I guess it all comes down to one fact: In the end, I’m the one with the armies.
–The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson
There are many revelations, and I won’t give any of them away, but they culminate into a brilliant “Ah ha!” moment when the reader finally sees [not a spoiler, you learn this in the beginning] why the Hero of Ages is now the Lord Ruler. Brilliant character development and story telling here.
That’s all subtext though. I know.
The actual plot follows a thieving crew who’s been hired to overthrow the lord ruler. It takes a fairly predictable path, but that’s ok. What’s interesting are the two protagonists whose relationship grows so subtly throughout the book.
There are probably a thousand different moments of slight character progression as they transition from one mentality to another, or as they loose or gain insecurities, or grow just a little closer to another character. It’s fascinating to see all this constant movement feel so natural, and it’s brilliantly done.
This is fantasy, and it contains a unique magic system. It’s fun, limited, and believable. Some people have one magic ability, others have many, and the rest have none. I enjoyed the fact that the magic behaved differently than magic I’ve seen before. It turned out to be a mix of Jedi and Matrix powers, and the combination was fun.
The environment is believable enough. It doesn’t stray too far into fantasy lane, meaning there aren’t any elves or ogres or goblins, etc. The ash the constantly falls from the sky was a really nice touch, and the mist itself is an ever-present thing. I enjoyed how the mist felt like a character at some points. It’s these details that carry the setting and keep it interesting.
Brandon Sanderson’s writing is direct and clear at all times. He doesn’t really get bogged down with metaphors or imagery, opting instead to be clear and concise. Prose flow well without getting in the way. It works well when there’s so many intricacies to the plot that any confusion would hamper the story.
He smiled despite the grief he felt at the deaths of his men; he smiled because that was what he did. That was how he proved to the Lord Ruler-and to himself-that he wasn’t beaten.
–The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson
Some writers like to get readers to think through their prose, but Brandon Sanderson likes to get writers to think through his characters and their relationships. I guess what I’m trying to say is: the writing never stood out to me in a bad way, but never stood out in a great way either. It works well and delivers the ideas it needs to effortlessly.
Read this book! Other than the beginning, I don’t have any gripes. This was one of the best fantasy books I’ve ever read, up there with Name of the Wind (if you know me, you know how high praise that is). So give the man some money and have a great time reading.
Recently I’ve been feeling a bit more artsy fartsy. I’m drawing. Part of it was brought on by painting miniatures for my Dungeons & Dragons campaign. And part was inspired by author Austin Kleon who describes himself as a “writer who draws”.
About halfway through reading his fantastic book Show Your Work, I looked at his sketches and remembered how much I used to draw. It’s been a while, but there was a time when I was half way through illustrating a comic book (a long, long time ago and those pages will never be seen online).
Hey Austin, sorry for bombarding you with mentions the last couple weeks. I’m almost done reading Show Your Work so that’s gonna slow down real quick.
Anyway, I’m stealing his “writer who draws” deal, and now I’m drawing too. Take that Austin! Stealing like an artist without having even read the first book (he wrote another book called Steal Like an Artist, which is on my to read list).
So without further gullyfluff (Victorian word meaning the stuff that collects in your pocket), here’s a bunch of self portraits I drew last week.
So there you have it. Come back next Thursday for another week of self portraits. I’m curious to see how my style changes from week to week as this goes on. Till next time.
Picking my next read is a task brimming with possibilities. So many things to consider, so much to gain from a good choice, so much disappointment from a bad one.
I’ve been thinking about what I want from my next reading experience, but am torn in several directions. One of my goals this year is to read more difficult but rewarding books, a bill that was filled by my previous two very different reads Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy and The Iron Council by China Mieville. Both definitely work to get through, but both were amazing in their own unique ways.
I also want to read more unique post apocalyptic novels, because 1) I enjoy them, and 2) I’m writing in that genre and need to scope out the competition. I’ve read a few post apocalyptic books in the past (my favorites being The Road by Cormac McCarthy, I Am Legend by Richard Matheson, and is Roadside Picnic considered post apocalyptic(?)).
I’ve narrowed my next book down to four very different choices, and I want your input. Pick from one of the options below, click on the tweet thingy and fill in your choice of book with one reason why. It can be any reason, even if you think it just has the best cover.
The choices are: Station Eleven by Emily St John Mandel, Pulp by Charles Bukowski, Stoner by John Williams, or My Struggle by Karl Ove Knausgaard
Let me know what I should read next by filling in the blanks in the tweet below:
I first heard about Station Eleven while googling for “best post apocalyptic novels” or “best dystopian novels” or something like that. I saw it mentioned more than once, thought that was a good sign (though I have read terrible books from ‘best of…’ lists, so you never know).
This came up and I mentioned it to my wife. “I’ve only heard great things about that book” she said, and then, “Read it ’cause I want to read it and we should read it together!” But she’s currently reading something else so it’ll be a while before we can read this together? Should I get started early? Probably because she reads SO MUCH FASTER than me.
Really, that’s all I know about Station Eleven. I haven’t looked at its goodreads page, I haven’t even cracked it open. All I know is it’s supposed to be good and it shares the genre that I’m currently writing in. Should I read it?
I’ve never read a Charles Bukowski book. I think many people consider that a crime. I don’t know much about him except that he’s highly regarded and wrote books with titles like Ham on Rye. To be honest, I don’t know what’s kept me away from Bukowski for so long.
Anyway, I only own one of his books, Pulp. I have a feeling that it’s not the Bukowski book you’re ‘supposed’ to start with, but it’s the one I own. So there.
For some reason I put Charles Bukowski in the same camp as Kurt Vonnegut (one of my all time favorites), but I don’t know if that’s accurate or not. They just seem to exude similar vibes. Am I wrong? Should I read it next?
Stoner, I have heard, is one of the best American novels ever written. This is a novel that’s been floating around my periphery for years. I think I heard about it first from an article from a publication like The Guardian or something. It wasn’t this article but it was a similar one to this.
I forgot about it for a while, then rediscovered it through this YouTube video by Better Than Food, the book recommendation channel by Clifford Lee Sargent @BksBtrThnFood. He gives it about as high of a recommendation possible, which has me intrigued. Should I listen to Clifford and read it next?
I only recently heard about My Struggle. This one I also learned about from Clifford Lee Sargent (there, I think I linked to all of his things, lol) while bingeing his channel. The same day I watched this video I went to Half Price Books and found the book in the staff recommendations section. It felt like a fatey type of thing, so I bought it.
It’s been a few months since then and the details as to what makes this book great are escaping me now. All I know is that some people who I think have decent taste like it, so hopefully I’ll like it too. Should I read it next though?
I’ve taken up illustrating. I’m drawing myself as well as other random things.
I’ve started sharing these stupid little sketches with you a bit already, but there’s more coming whether you like it or not.
Anyway, you’ll notice the site looks way different. New pictures, new theme, everything is dog gone new.
The reasons are simple. I want more simplicity, plus I want to have a distinctive presence online. I’ve blended in with everyone else seeking attention online. I’m sick of it. So drawing. Not to worry, the content here will still largely focus on my writing and other writing and reading related topics, but now with a bit more permanent marker thrown in.